The Demolition Girl

Have you ever had one of those days where you wished you'd just turned off the alarm and stayed in bed? Well, I had one of those today.

It all started with our TV. Now for those of you who aren't familiar with SL, you can have a functional TV in your house! Of course I'm using the term "functional" loosely, because while it does work, I'll be danged if I can find anything worth watching on it. Well, yesterday I found a better use for our TV, I found that you can load pictures in it and use it as a slide show projector! Yay! Well naturally I immediately loaded it up with photos of Elisa and me, because that's just what our house needs, more big jumbo pics of us! Unfortunately Wani wasn't there, so we still needed to put a pic of her in our cool new slide projector.

Well, this morning I caught up with Wani, and I told her about our cool new use for the TV and asked her to give me a pic so I could load it into the TV. She thought it was a cool idea, found a pic, and put it out on the floor for me to pick up. Except something went wrong. Instead of rezzing a pick that I could take into my inventory, it somehow got embedded in the floor as a texture, and now we had a big pic of Wani's face on the floor near the bar! Since it was now actually part of the floor, neither one of us could pick it up or delete it.

Well Wani had to go, so I figured I'd mess around with it and try to get it out of there. I found that could actually edit the floor itself, and when I do there is a tab that comes up called textures. Well, when I clicked on that, there was wani's pic! Ok, this was going to be easy, all I need to do is get rid of the pic and change it back to the original texture. Well, I tried changing the texture to default, but unfortunately default wasn't what I expected, it was some ugly texture that didn't match the rest of the house at all. Worse than that, it had now changed the texture on a good portion of the rest of the house and the windows too! So now I had gotten Wani's face out of the floor, but I had completely messed up the floor and wall textures throughout the house, and we could no longer see out of our windows to boot!

Have I ever mentioned that I'm a ditz? Not to be deterred, I tried putting a pic back in figuring if I could at least get back to my original mess I could still figure it out. Unfortunately that just made it even worse, now I had a pic of Beth & I naked in my sauna tiled all over the walls and windows on the house! (Like I couldn't have just picked a nice picture of a sunset or something right? Sheesh!)

Now I was starting to panic, I just kept making it worse and worse. I saw SpacePuppy was online so I asked him if he knew anything about textures, but as usual he was no help at all. I tried checking the texture of the unaffected areas and as far as I could tell there didn't seem to be any texture loaded at all for those spots. I thought maybe if I just deleted the texture in the messed up area it would fix this nightmare and set everything back to the way it should be. I figured what the hell, I can't make it any worse right? Have I ever mentioned that I'm a ditz?

When you start messing around with stuff you really don't know how to use, there inevitably comes a time when you have to say "Ok, that's it, I really don't know what I'm doing, so I had better stop before I REALLY mess this up!". Unfortunately, I'm really bad at recognizing when that time is. When I deleted the texture, I deleted more than the texture, I somehow managed to delete the whole beachfront side of the house! Walls, windows, floors, everything. So now I was pretty much standing in the open air looking at what used to be our house, and our stuff was just kind of floating in the air mocking me. Have I ever mentioned... Never mind, you get the idea.

At this point I had no choice but to call our landlord Sammy. Unfortunately she couldn't fix it either, and I ended up having to buy a whole new house . Anyway, Sammy put the house up and got it positioned as best she could, then I pretty much spent the rest of the day running around fixing whatever was out of line (which, of course, was pretty much everything). Our bar seems to have completely disintegrated (Maybe I somehow managed to beam it into the dimwit dimension, I have no idea). A couple of other things are also missing, probably embedded in the walls but I'll be danged if I'm going to try and edit ANYTHING to try and get them out. The new house (which I don't even own) cost me 2200L (That's about $11 in $US), and for all I know I still have to replace the stupid bar too {sigh}. Oh, and my landlady now probably thinks I'm a complete disaster since the last time I talked to her was to rescue me from some kook I picked up in the Forced Sex Roleplay dimension that wouldn't leave.

Oh well, at least I finally got the damned picture loaded in the TV...

Until next time...

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SPEED CHAT in the Bedrooms

You meet someone cute…you peruse their profile and see that they like their sex the same way you like yours…their pics are hot…their avatar is dressed oh, so provocatively…you’re beginning to tingle! You coyly (or not so coyly) suggest retiring to a bedroom. Once there, you both rip your duds off like teenagers in heat for the first time, see who can click on the other one first, and hop in the sack together. Sounds great, doesn’t it?

But then the trouble starts. After clicking on “69”, say, and you are both munching happily away, YOU type: “gosh, you’re hot. I’m glad I found you tonight!” THEY: ‘Uh’.

You: “mm, your getting me so hot, luv. It feels wonderful!” THEY: ‘Uh!’.

You: “Pardon me, I just got a phone call in rl”. THEY: ‘Uh!!!’

Okay, so I exaggerate a little, but you get the picture: Your new partner turns out to have an entire vocabulary of just 33 little phrases. Every time you type something original and personal, you get a long pause (are their eyes focused on anything but the avatars??), followed by “I love your cock”, or some other drivel. There can be several possible causes of this:

1) If you were sleeping with them in real life, you’d only hear the same 33 phrases. We’ve all been there, done that. They are not stupid, necessarily, but they sure LACK IMAGINATION. The only thing worse in bed than lack of imagination is poor personal hygiene (Thank God you don’t get THAT problem in rlc!). If the survival of the species depended on procreation with these folks, we’d have never made it past the Stone Age…Uh!!

Possible solution: Try chatting a bit more before you hop in the hay. Say something you think is ‘witty’, and see what you get for a response. And how long it takes to get the response. In retrospect, this one is your fault, for not performing due diligence first – you horny devil, you!!

2) They are busy ‘enjoying themselves’ with both hands, and only occasionally reach up to make a ‘quick click’ and then they are ‘back to work’ on their crotch. These folks also become obvious when their orgasms don’t match up at all with what the avatars are doing onscreen. The whole process seems a little disjointed, and out of phase. VERY FRUSTRATING when you’re trying to achieve intimacy of some sort over the Internet.

Possible solution: Cum quick (or fake it), and get the hell out of there. Go find an ‘old friend’ to get it on with for the night.

2a) They are masturbating with only one hand, but it is the same hand that they type with.
2b) You get some original responses onscreen, but they are slower in coming (no pun intended) than yours. This is your standard ‘one-hand wanker’, and he/she is typing with the other. Grin, because if you really get them going, you can make a mess of their keyboard!

Possible solution: Before bedding any stranger, ask them if they took Typing Class in school.

Alternative solution: Have rlc give typing tests to prospective members, and charge $40/month to those who flunk (or better yet, make their avatars wear a big, red F on their forehead – so we can spot them ahead of time).

Best solution: Ask them to strap the vibrator to their crotch BEFORE you begin making love.

3) They don’t speak English, or do so very poorly. Hey, not their fault. You were both horny, after all, and you don’t need the English language to build a sexy, sultry avatar.

Possible solution: look at their profile again – get past the pics, this time, horndog! – and you’ll see their language(s) listed. Sure, there are fakers in rlc, but I’ve never seen anyone answer this one dishonestly – yet.

Now I’m not anti-poor typists, or anti-people who struggle with the English language, but I don’t want to sleep with them, either. Not if I’m going to enjoy it, too. Join with me in this crusade to stamp out BEDROOM BANALITY! Insist on LITERATE SEX!!

THE FINAL NIGHTMARE: You are cuddling, post-coitally, basking in the warm afterglow of a wonderful orgasm. You stroke them gently on the shoulder, and kiss their cheek. YOU: “Mmmmmm…thank you, love, I really enjoyed it. I’d love to see you again.” THEY: ‘uh’

And finally, the RECURRING NIGHTMARE: You’ve found the perfect one: they are gorgeous, witty, and willing. You wander through rlc-land, hand-in-hand, searching for a bedroom which doesn’t already have 3 lurking pervs in attendance. Finally, on the 2nd floor of the bordello, in a tiny corner room, you find blissful solitude. You actually strip slowly, stopping to admire your new partner’s underclothing, and then you see their magnificent bod for the very first time! You sit on the edge of the bed, billing and cooing. Your temperature has reached the boiling point. You’ve forgotten to get out your dildo, but you’re so turned on you won’t even need it!! You reach over to gently stroke their ass and……………system crash.

Let me know if you agree (big grin)

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New Zabys and UI in QA!!

This was postet by Brian on the member forum:

    Hi All,

    I've got some new developments to report!

    We have a new User Interface and new Zaby's, including a new prop-editing system, and all new functions all available on QA!

    There are still a few things that we're ironing out, but, as you'll see, Zabys are close to being released to production!

    I can now report on some new features and pricing.

    Zabys are now enabled with the ability to allow certain lists of people to do certain things. On your QA profile, you will see small links after you click on your Zaby, for "Rent Deposit" and for "House Rules"

    In production, Zabys will be Free for the basic model, + ®50 Rays to add a deck to any model, and otherwise range in price from ®50 to ®150 per month. Luxury Zabys will be available in the range of ®750 per month. (Prices are not yet finalized). You may want to get some Rays now, while they are still pretty cheap

    Under "House Rules" you will find the ability to manage permissions for your Zaby. So, for example, you can let the public in, or just let your friends in, or allow flying, or otherwise give and deny permissions to users. You can also grant people the ability to Decorate your Zaby, so you can get an interior designer to help you out, if you so desire!

    The Prop-Editor does not have instructions yet, so it may seem confusing at first. I suggest that people ask questions and provide answers to each other, and staff will try to help out as we can, in the forums. Once we iron out a few final issues, we will get to work on a quick user-guide for the Prop-Editing system.

    There are still minor issues with the new UI. QA users should feel free to report any bugs through normal QA channels.

    To all QA testers, thanks for the help! Feel free to provide screen shots and otherwise tell us what you think about everything!

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1) Physical - You have scoured the textures of RLC and come up with a seductive outfit that, when I first see it, makes me drop everything else and dial up your profile, as my knickers begin to swell…
And………Your profile pics are a real turn on! They are either the ‘real you’, or the who ‘you’d like to be’, or depict ‘what you’d like to be done to you, or with you, or by you', in RLC. Or a combination of all of the above. My brain cells don’t care which - or my gonads, for that matter, either. And I don’t mean stark naked! Stark naked is, well, stark *frown*. If you give me something scantily clad, with a suggestion of hidden fruits, and a mysterious smile – I’m hooked! A mere puddle at your feet (and my feet by now, also) *giggle*.

2) Intellectual - I’m dancing at Candy’s, say, and I hear a remark in general chat that sounds so smart and sassy, I might’ve made it myself. So I put my dancing on autopilot, and dial up your profile, as my knickers begin to swell…
And…….Your profile contains: a) No ‘N/A’s b) The sections ‘About Me’ and “Who I’d Like to Meet’ are filled out, and with complete sentences. Sentences that actually make sense. c) There are blogs, and the blogging is either humorous or thought-provoking, or both (No self-quizzes, porn vids, or one-liners aimed at merely collecting the Rays).

3) Fuck Buddy - This one is simply #1 combined with #2….I return to RLC, ask for an “Add”, and start to flirt like crazy *tee hee*.

4) Perverted Fuck Buddy - As above, but when I’m with you I get persistent thoughts in my head that I could NEVER mention to Mommy, Daddy, or my real life Significant Other…but when I mention them to you, I see your panties starting to drip.

5) Intellectual Fuck Buddy (with Perversion) - Top Drawer! First Class! Yummy, yummy, yummy! Your Levels of Friendship mirror mine, and we arrive at this level simultaneously. My heart and my xxx are throbbing in unison! I begin to rethink my vow to remain ‘unattached’ in RLC – fortunately (for BOTH of us, *ha ha*) this feeling is like intestinal gas – it eventually passes *groan*. Hey, there’s a topic for another blog: Why farts don’t stink in RLC. But I digress…

6) Hand-to-Hold, Shoulder-to-Cry On, True Blue, Steady, Uncomplicated FRIENDSHIP, and…WITHOUT DRAMA!! We have just consummated our horny desires. We lay breathless, spooning and cuddling. We find more to talk about than just our bodies…and the silences are warm and wonderful, not strained and awkward. These, to me, are the golden moments in RLC. They are what make cyber-friendships unique from their real life counterparts. They are precious. They make it all worthwhile: all the boots, and the rudeniks, and the drama, and everything else we put up with in here. Do you agree?

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Clubs, Houses, Families, Brother & Sisterhoods, Gangs, etc.

We all noticed these last months how, many, Houses, Families, Group, Societies, Brotherhoods, Sisterhoods and other Gangs flourished on Red Light Center . Since RLC started, groups appeared.

But why on earth are we all so keen to join one of them. Nothing very new under the sun. Isn’t it true that in real live, people act the same way. So many of us want to be a part of a group, a member in a club: sports club, leisure club, hobby club, collectors club, VIP club, Jet Set …sects…, etc.

Red Light Center it’s the same. You get the impression that people are thinking, ones they belong to a group, they feel more safe or strong, they hope to get some guarantees that they will be cherished and pampered by their fellow members.

Of course there are the radical loners (like the lonesome cowboy), who are against any form of regrouping. They come to Red Light Center to have fun, they consider Red Light Center as one big club, and they don’t see any reason to be a part of a subdivision.

But let’s get back to our subject: regrouping of users and more particular to the motivation of these groups and who is behind it.

Since I arrived on Red Light Center , I noticed so many groups, coming and going. Some of them nearly survived one month or even a week. The reason for that is that a lot of groups are started by one user, who wants to impose his (her) will on others. Ones they realise that there is more then that to keep a group together, they will soon throw the sponge in the ring, and disappears trough the back door.

Since a few weeks a profile on Red Light Center tries to draw a list of all the clubs and groups in Red Light Center : Houses_of_U and for now they regroup about 70 “societies”, with or without tags. I personally know a few more, so to my estimation we will reach 100 different clubs and groups on this site.

But the question is not why you want to join a group, but for what reason and do that particular group respond to your requirements. It’s all about motivations and possible hidden agenda’s.

A few weeks ago I noticed that a “nationalistic” group appeared in Red Light Center, I still don’t think that Red Light Center is a good place for that, but there is worse, some of the groups around are real “gangs” with bad intension towards individuals and other communities. Of course a usual phenomenon of our society. The reason is simple: some individuals are real troublemakers in Red Light Center, but instead of acting on their own, risking exclusion by Uthervers, they act behind screen and manipulate people to create trouble. Some events in the last weeks, is a clear prove of that. (Its nothing new, when I arrived on this site in June last year “gang wars” where frequent).

In other cases some groups become kind of sects. Here we enter the most dangerous part of this site. This never happens by accident. In most of the cases the new members become the victim of a hidden agenda. As a great part of what happens here influences our minds, predators use this way to manipulate people, most of the time lonely people, who need a lot of attention, are the first victims.

In my opinion, the Uthervers team must keep a closer eye on that, before it become too important and threats the fun of this site.

So if you feel the need to join a group, because you have a friend there or because you are attracted to their “philosophy” always check first where you put your feet.

You need to keep some basic precautions in mind:

  • Always check carefully the motivations, from the group you want to enter. (Read the club rules with a lot of care)

  • Try to talk to a lower member, who joined the group a few weeks before you, about the atmosphere in the group. (Especially in Dom/sub groups).

  • Avoid groups with a “one person” leadership, they never last long.

  • If fees are asked, inquire about the transparency f the financial system in the group. (Many groups disappeared because of money fights)

What about Tags ? I am personally against name changes in favour of a club. Of course it make it easy to recognize a fellow member (in small clubs it don’t have much sense). It every case it will underline the power that somebody has over you and it will create to some of your friends the wrong impression (of course dependable from the reputation of your club). As my first reflex, when I meet somebody, is to examin his or her profile, I am more in favour to mention an affiliation in the profile. It also creates the opportunity to explain why you join this or that club.

One last thing. Some groups have a heavy entrance procedure, to create the impression that they are very “exclusive” and that you are privileged to become a part of them. That’s only a way to impress you, don’t fall in that trap. The result can go in the opposite way. I noticed that some new recruits of groups lost a part of their friends, because the joined a particular group, so one advice: don’t jump too fast. Don’t forget that leaving some group can be in some cases quite difficult. You can end in a situation where harassment is not a vain word.
So never forget, joining a group can be very nice as long as it increase your fun in Red Light Center . In the other case a runner is the best solution.

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Two faced friends: the never ending story

About the famous and most popular repost mail in Red Light Center.

First I have to say that I am not a great fan of reposting mail. Only if the information is relevant to be wide spread, I will edit it in a blog or included it in my own point of view. I share my opinions with my friends. If they think it can be useful for other users, then they are free to use my text to send it further.

I am around for about 15 months and I was hit by this repost a couple of 100 times, the most popular “spam” in Red Light Center. I never replied to it and yes… I was rarely dropped from a list, so ?

It’s a pity we can’t get rays for copyrights, because the one who first wrote the original text could be able today to buy the whole Uthervers with his (her) copyright fees.

I am not sure if every user who actually reposted this mail, red it carefully as it is absolute nonsense.

The basic question is: do I put my friends on a test (brrr... don’t like this word), to find out if they are really a friend. If you transpose this to real live, you need to send a sms to every of your friends to check if he or she wants to remain your friend… absurd isn’t it. Worse here you put it in the papers.

Why in heaven’s name are people not able to establish for themselves who will remain in their social circle ?

I agree that some have long friends list and not always for the right reason.
I take myself as an example: why have I such a long friends list ?

- Because I am already here for a long time.

- Because I am lazy (I always have the intention to clean up my list and always postponed it – I guess now it’s too late)

- My friends list is not actually a list of friends, it’s my social diary on Red Light Center, it contains: My best friends, my lovers, my friends, My pen pals, my chat friends, my acquaintances, My business relations and… last but not least: the people I like to keep an eye on (lol).

Of course I realise that some of the users in my list already left RLC, but for some of them, I really hope to meet them again one day.

When your list is important, you always find a friend in any room you enter. I used to say hello to everybody, and it happens that it is to somebody I didn’t chat to for ages. Sometimes they don’t’ reply, drowned in pm land, oh well next time more luck. Sometimes… yes bingo, we start a chat and old memories comes up and it even end up in a cuddle. Isn’t that wonderful ? I wouldn’t miss that for a Kingdom (or was it a horse ?).

Anyway, is it such a burden to have a large friends list? I don’t think so and what’s wrong about being popular…
Of course I know that some “friend’s request” are sent, only for having the opportunity to have a peek at your private
parts… sorry… pictures. But we have to be honest a lot of users are real “rate” hunters, so this so called “friendship” is only for personal benefit. Of course after a while that “relation” will be gone in thin air. But again that’s your decision don’t’ ask others to decide in your place.

So please, I beg you on my bare knees (need to put my pants down for that), no more two “face friends”…

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